Due to the nature of this book I don’t believe spoiler alerts are necessary, but still make sure to write where you are when you discuss things since you want to give context for people to know what you’re talking about and where to look for it.
The last sentence in 人並み was interesting as basically the author is saying that through globalisation and the internet this is slowly but surely vanishing.
The author seems to have fairly conservative views in general - having been born in 1944 I would be surprised if he didn’t.
Acknowledging/realizing that society is no longer what it was 40+ years ago can be difficult, imo. (I am not even that old but I still notice some changes in my country that I am not particularly fond of. )
I did not expect to even get this small acknowledgment of modern times changing society. I expected the book to just describe the “ideal” without ever dipping into the reality of changing times.
I first heard the expression while watching the series 中二病でも恋がしたい! | L27. Lovely over the top comedy by the way.
Someone watched the two MCs‘ building and balcony from behind some hedge, another came along and asked what they are doing there, meaning why not go right away to the building and ring the bell. There came that phrase
I think I’ve heard it first used in manga weaponized like the author mentioned in the chapter (I think that’s maybe where I also learned TPO too?). I was also aware of KYな人 for the same meaning… maybe I just already knew too much for this keyword
When I first encountered that concept I was like: Do ppl really not understand how to read the room (or between the lines)?
But then I heard multiple US Americans living in Japan that it was one of the more difficult things to learn/get used to for them. So, apparently, it’s not a common feature but depends on the culture you grew up in. Austria seems to be similar to Japan in this regard.
My nonscientific observation is that it’s (usually white) American men who can’t 空気を読む. The rest of us have to do it even in America but they get a pass most of the time and don’t need to. So they also can’t do it in Japan.
I haven’t even read these chapters yet but, ahem let me weigh in and give my anecdotal opinion too! This is mostly from the pov of communication in the workplace…
Opinions!!
Intercultural communication fun!
I’ve lived and worked in a few different countries and I feel like the U.S. is somewhere in the middle between high-context and low-context communication for sure. I have noticed that being a 空気を読める person is valued in white collar environments, but it is referred to as emotional intelligence in English instead. Both reading the air and emotional intelligence are about trying to understand your + others emotions and how certain things can impact them, really. If someone doesn’t have it, people who do just throw up their hands and try to work around them. I see those who do have high EQ having a smoother time with interpersonal relationships, but it’s not a must because others are just out there having success through brute forcing stuff (but people may not like them and stop following them as a leader or taking them seriously at some point). There may be some trends or stereotypes about who has more EQ/空気を読む skills for sure, though.
Working in German speaking environments, it’s not like EQ didn’t exist, but there was more value placed on (and maybe more respect associated with?) expressing your opinion and letting someone else know where things stand from your point of view so that mutual understanding is reached that way through some kind of negotiation or discussion. I mean, it wasn’t like that with every single person of course, but just as a general trend that I noticed.
When I’ve worked with Japanese people, I’ve been surprised as an American how far the consideration and suppositions about other people’s feelings go. It can encompass way more things than I’d normally consider like hierarchy, age, 面子 etc, which again makes sense, but aren’t always on my radar due to the values I grew up with. One example of something I found unexpected was when a Japanese colleague accidentally let another colleague slightly higher in the hierarchy, but not the boss, know about something important for the whole business before the 課長 knew. She was very worried about the 課長 finding out and even went to apologize to him. For context, the information itself wasn’t such a big deal, but rather the fact that she was worried he would feel disrespected because she talked to the other person and didn’t report to him first. When I saw that going down, I felt like I was looking behind the veil at a system that was invisible to me and suddenly felt scared about how many violations I must have been making. This was a really long time ago, though!!
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One example of something I found unexpected was when a Japanese colleague accidentally let another colleague slightly higher in the hierarchy, but not the boss, know about something important for the whole business before the 課長 knew. She was very worried about the 課長 finding out and even went to apologize to him. For context, the information itself wasn’t such a big deal, but rather the fact that she was worried he would feel disrespected because she talked to the other person and didn’t report to him first. When I saw that going down, I felt like I was looking behind the veil at a system that was invisible to me and suddenly felt scared about how many violations I must have been making. 